I will begin in apologizing that I will not in fact be talking about Sean Connery (look him up in Gawain and the Green Knight for a good laugh) and Gob Bluth (watch Arrested Development... just watch it... DO IT NOW!), nor will I talk about President Indiana Solo, my father Ra's Al Jin, Boramir the Irish cossack and true son of the Emperor, or King Emperor Jean-Luc Septim (Even though these people are pretty much the coolest people on the planet... oh and of course MacGyver, Kirk, and my celebrity crush, Angela Brewster Connor).
Rather I will ramble, its been a good while since my last one and I feel you are far overdue. I had planned on writing almost every day this past week, but it has been busy an I have had almost no sleep until today (almost no sleep is common for me, 5 hours or less a night, but when I admit to almost no sleep that means roughly 2 or less... Darn insomnia... and games... beautiful games) The short of it is, it has been a long week.
Most of the week has had this thick cloud of depression hovering over it... I'm not really quite sure why, its been a fun week but It's a hard feeling to kick. I'll be going along and BAM something will happen that just hurts, shows me truth I didn't want to know or reminds me of something I tried to forget. But I will try to avoid most of that here as its dull compared to the adventures of the week.
On Thursday I think... I saw the most beautiful woman on the planet. I know this is true, there is none that even half compare. I saw her, had to do a double take, then a triple take. I could not help but check her out over and over and over and over. The funny thing is I had told myself that I would not attempt to hit on women for the next week or month or however long I can (I had decided that early on Thursday), and I could not break that the first day (what a test to see her). Now the funny thing is, I could not describe her for the life of me now. I don't even remember if she was a blonde or brunette. I have no recollection about any of her features. Now you would think that since she was drop dead gorgeous I would remember a face like that, especially after probably creeping her out as i dragged my jaw along the floor. But somehow I have absolutely no memory of her other than she was amazing. This however would allow me to pick her out of a lineup of pretty girls since she would make every one look ugly. Life is funny that way huh.
Later I had a conference with a prof of mine (I can use abbreviations here, its academia the place where such things are discouraged)(I have questioned her sanity on several occasions and I think this time takes the cake). We set up a meeting to discuss something I am working on and the first sign that something was wrong is she scheduled it for 9am... thats right, that hour that is only a myth to most college students. So in the meeting she first told me what the focus of my paper was (which was not the focus of my paper), and then proceeded to scold me since I had not lived up to fulfilling it (since it was not the focus of my paper). I could not tell her this because I think she already is quite disappointed in me for frequently skipping her class and we have reached the sort of interaction that most of my professional bosses and I have. Basically they hate my guts because I go around their "orders" to complete a task in a more efficient way (yes sadly i am not lying about this).
Later I got a letter telling me that my parking citation was in fact not dropped. I sent several letters and calls their way and the best response I got was that the thing I posted earlier was their system output for me not having it dropped. Apparently saying "resolved" meant that they had read my response and not that it was in fact resolved, and the amount due line which read $0 meant that my fine amount was not adjusted and I still owe the full amount. Yeah, its a total load of B.S. But sadly I can do nothing more than use voodoo dolls to torture the employees and burn down the building. But both of those would take effort and right now I'm so pissed that I no longer care... Jerks! (dear reader, you unfortunately have just witnessed the worst insult known to my vocabulary, and here comes the worst curse, may they forever have boring underpaying desk jobs.)
I spent a day running from society to visit my uncle in po-dung farm ville where he just bought a bunch of land that has buildings from the 1800's on it. We did some exploring, some talking and had lunch, it was nice (except for the hours and hours of driving). There he and his wife did not actually condemn my decision to be an English major (which I thought they would) and suggested that I become a writer since our family has none right now and is due for another famous one.
I spent the weekend being the DD for a double party (got to drive a HUGE minivan quite the contradiction in terms)(man, designated driving is... well... worse than baby sitting) but it was fun. We went to a karaoke bar which was quite the experience and I actually almost regret not singing (almost).
Oh, I should do a follow up on the election day thing... Let me just say that I am not a racist and that I am quite American. The night was spent in the hometown Grille and Bar with friends drinking the election away. Luckily the totally awesome people that work there whom I personally know and love also hung out to watch. And I scold JH for cheating on me with her boyfriend of four + years... Doesn't our three year client-server relationship mean anything to you? After she was cut she went to hang out with her boyfriend rather than sit and drink with us. But I forgive her, she is the nicest person in the world after all (no joke), so I suppose this time I will let it slip.
Well, its that time again. Time to start thinking about the homework I should be doing as I play games, watch movies, listen to the radio, and read a book. And that's right, All at the same time. Yeah, I am a talented multitasker, if only my memory worked and I was not crazy and could never find any good women (well except for that once, I wish things could be different) life would be good... Oh and a job would be nice. But no instead I am cursed with beautiful wonderful cynicism, a high I.Q. and a rapport with women slightly reminiscent of John Nash (i have studied body language, nonverbal communication, telepathy and conversational speaking before, and have not met one yet who uses them the way the books say). Oh well, it was suggested that I go speed-dating. Fat chance! I'd rather try one of those online services I insult on a regular basis. At least then I can view my failure from a computer screen and not face to face.
Now I know this post is already unbearably long but I wanted to take a moment to discuss faith, something I have mostly avoided in this column. I have been learning that it is not when I want to see something that it I can see, but rather when I open my eyes to seeing. An interesting lesson to be learning. Just think about it, I wrote it in a physical and metaphorical way and both are true. Just because I will something to be in front of me does not mean that it exists, or even that if I want something really bad, even so bad that I believe it that it is real. But only when you open your eyes to everything, going around with them shut and imagining what you want only goes so far (even though I firmly believe in it) and one must be open to accepting what comes, no matter what it is. A boss does not look for an employee who thinks they can do anything, they look for an employee who is willing to try anything. Be willing to do whatever you are called to and your eyes will open a little more, it may be painful, no one ever said it was easy, but it will bring you to a new place.
(fun fact: Utopia actually means "no place" in greek, which is why it is perfect, because it does not exist. Dystopia or Cacotopia means the opposite of that idea, but not that term.)
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