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Ah, the days are so long, but do not pass slow enough. Today I started the day much like one of last week, that is, driving up to a funeral. Last week I was honored to attend the funeral of a good friend's grandmother, and this week I was there for a family friend. I had worked along side the guy in the past, but knew little about him. It was held on the Annapolis Naval Academy grounds, as he was a rear admiral. It was hard. I saw his wife, and heard his sense of humor come out as he made everyone who spoke agree to not talk about him at his own funeral just weeks before.

Later I heard from a friend who is away at a college masters interview. I was glad to hear that it went well, and a time ago it sounded like Minnesota was where she wanted to go, but she has since decided to stay more local. No matter what happens, I hope she goes where she will be happy.

I have been continually finding out about my secret stalker audience. Every several days someone else admits begrudgingly that they frequent this blog from time to time. Well, it's creepy, but thank you for your secret support loyal readers. I estimate that roughly fifteen to twenty read this, but since only four of you are man enough to comment or register I really have no idea. But its cool, thanks for giving me a piece of your day.

The day ends now for me at a community service event. Every year my church hosts a local event around valentines day. The event has the men of the church (of which I am one) prepare and serve the women of the community a fully catered four course meal, plus live music. It's quite classy. So this is how I end the day. Even though I work here in a paid position, I still enjoy doing unpaid work, especially when its for a good cause and I get a free meal.

Well, I have a huge number of links to sort through, but since this post is serious, I will not change that mood. To all of you I wish you well, go out and have fun. In the mean time I'll keep trying to learn to be an optimist (I consider myself a realist, but that may just be the term for an in-the-closet pessimist).

Cheers Y'all!

Addendum...

The speaker this night spoke about how God knows all of our needs, knows who we are, loves us exactly how we are, and will be there. A good message, but a hard one to hear. She spoke about how she lost her husband three years ago. Just as their marriage was at its height, and just as their fourth child was born. I have been so closely touched by death and stories of loss that I sincerely hope I am not being prepared for loss. It may be petty to fear for my own self centered life but I do. I don't know if I'm in the middle of the desert, just entering it, or finally leaving it, but I must keep walking because there is no other way to get through it.

I am broken.